As you may be aware, I have been having an online spat with iblastinside, who, unlike me, and hopefully the vast majority of guys who like watching and having bareback sex, makes statements like "if you’re a barebacker, then why the fuck does it matter. We’re on the same team". As if the two things (stealthing and bareback) were the same. They are not! My last entry was to try to highlight how his behaviour is morally/ethically no different to that of a con man. He has written his
retort here. I will make this my last mention of the issue (for now anyway - depends how much more stealthing iBlastInside writes about and riles me up in the future, but I really don't see what more can be said on this pathetic matter). To me, this issue is so fucking obvious, it's amazing that iBlastinside can continue to defend his criminal behaviour. So in response to his "defence" where he claims I miss his point so very much:
1.
I don’t wander the streets seeking people to stealth. Quite the contrary. I make the distinct point of stating I invite these people into my lair or fuck them at an adult bookstore or sex club. This isn’t some miscellaneous place. It isn’t rape. The sex itself is quite consensual. Both parties agree to the sex, unlike the mugger where one party doesn’t wish to be robbed but the other does.Quite
where one does ones conning is neither here nor there. A street, a sex club, a bank, a workplace, a prison. It's still conning somebody, whether you do it in public, at your own home, or at your victims home. "The sex is quite consesual". Yes, but the stealthing - the thing any sane person would have an issue with - ISN'T. That's the point, and it's that part that is wrong. "Both parties agree to the sex". Yes, but not the stealthing. Isn't that obvious? Isn't THAT what makes iblastinside's behaviour so reprehensible? Rape is a strong word, but surely the thing we consider wrong in the issue of rape is that the victim had their choice in the matter taken away. They were made to do something, or subjected to something, they would not wish to occur. In my "spot the difference" stories everybody was consenting to the things they were aware of, but were NOT given the choice to consent to the things that they were being misled by. So his 1st point misses MY point, so very much!
2.
A repairman coming into your home to fix plumbing or some other aspect (in his second example) is an implied contract or an actual contract. As I so explicitly stated, no such contract exists between the two of us engaging in sex. I never explicitly agree to engaging in safer sex.I totally disagree. iblastinside does not sign a contract before he has sex, of course. BUT, when you show the bottom your intention to use a condom, THERE is the implied contract! Which iblastinside breaks. He is TELLING the bottom through his actions - actions he makes sure the bottom is aware of - "I am putting a condom on". But then, he removes the condom, and breaks the contract. If there was no condom in the 1st place, if the bottom didn't believe he was using one, then of course, this is a different story. He explicitly agrees to engage in safer sex the moment he makes the bottom believe he is...engaging in safer sex!! This is what makes him a con man!
3.
Cristian further makes the assumption that I am the source of any exposure of disease. This is a further problem that condom Nazis often assume about all barebackers. We are all puss-filled, infected zombies full of the worst diseases with intent on bugging everyone around us. This simply isn’t so.
I am NOT a condom Nazi. Far from it. I believe that all people have to make their own choices regarding their sexual behaviour. I MAKE bareback porn, so can hardly be a condom Nazi! But this is the crux of the issue - choice! iblastinside does not give his bottoms a choice. He offers them sex. They ask for safe sex. He "agrees". That is the implied contract. But he lies. That is not a barebacker, that is a fraudster! As for diseases - to be honest, whether you are a puss infected, syphilitic AIDS defined hoispital patient, or totally healthy, you are STILL conning your bottoms if you stealth them - you are still doing something TO them against their will. So what if your spunk could infect them or not? That almost isn't the point. (Although being a barebacker in general, it is a distinct possibility you will infect them with something! iblastinside's insistance on his perfect health when he seems to bareback so much is quite laughable. If you have had bb sex even once since your last test, then you DO NOT KNOW what your sexual health is at that moment). The point is that, they DON'T want your cum in them, and you make sure it gets there anyway, against their will. This is why ibastinsides behaviour is no different to my examples in my last post. No matter where it happens, or what the technical details happen to be, he is still acting towards another person in a way that is fraudulent, self-seeking and uncompassionate. A bit like the bankers that got us into this financial mess!! If everybody felt the way iblastinside did about other people - using them for their own short term personal gains, to hell with the other persons needs/wants/desires/health, then we would end up - well, where we are actually! Which is why it is a big problem, and, as "James" commented under iblastinsides post, the "antithesis to everything that humanity has been climbing towards". Couldn't put it better myself. Thank God, there are people out there who can think outside their own selfish desires and recognise a greater goal.
Why, for iblastinside, does the sexual realm of behaviour seem so protected and detached from the moral standards we expect from others in a civilised society? It seems that, for iblastinside, his desire to spunk in a hole is so crutial to him, he will mislead, fraud and con men in order to do it, and he assumes that is his absolute right. He believes he isn't acting immorally, because it is his sexual drive he is serving, and so the other man in the equasion does not count. Trust me, I understand the desire! I am a top. I am an addict!! I just choose not to hurt other people to get my fix! And when, in the past I have done things I believe NOT to be treating others as I would wish to be treated, I have regretted it and used it as a lesson for how to behave in the future.
As I said on my twitter, we all have dark fantasies. Taboo is a very real part of most peoples sexual interests. Infact the very fact something is considered a taboo in the 1st place is often what gives it it's erotic kick. But it is one thing to recognise our plague of fantasies, jerk off to them, and quite another to act on them, intently to take away another persons choice. iblastinside is not a scorpion stinging a frog carrying him over the water. We are animals yes but we have become, over time, more than that, and should be looking at where we are going! He is a human being making moral choices everyday like everyone else. We all give into tempation we may wish didn't come to define us. Not all of us, however, celebrate and defend our greedy selfish behavior as if it were a virtue, or indeed victimless. There are
people right now,
standing up for something different. Maybe we can learn from these people and do something about it!